As a recovering middle- and high-school teacher, I empathize with this so deeply. I barely made it through two years, and the dread was so deep that I was envious of the construction flagger I passed every morning on my commute. I gazed longingly at the “We’re hiring!” sign at Walmart. I was working 15-hour days teaching 6 different subjects for the first time. The janitors had to kick me out every night at 10pm. And on top of that—the behaviors, the lack of support from the administration, the parents, etc.
Like you, I loved the actual teaching, and the kids (some of the most challenging ones loved me the most). But the job was hell. I don’t know how anyone managed during the pandemic when everything had to go online.
Please know you’re not alone, and I’m glad to see someone writing about this! I’d love to hear more about what motivated your decision to leave. Kudos for following your dream to write and make art! I’m doing the same (minus the art).
Wow. I just had to read this over twice to be sure it was real. I just started this Substack out of a need to get my thoughts on a page and hold myself accountable to remembering my teaching experience and also affirm my decision to leave. Then, to find your newsletter (which is fantastic by the way -- I'm not even sure how I stumbled upon it but I was reading through multiple essays of yours this morning), and for you to in turn read and RELATE to what I am writing about is even more serendipitous and beautiful!
Your comment inspires me to commit to centering my newsletter around the experience of being a teacher. As I wrote, I felt that while teaching I couldn't actually express what I was going through. Now that I have the time, I hope that other teachers find my writing and feel a little less alone too.
I decided to leave because I was burnt out and also tired of feeling like a cog in this very broken system. I hated that my job required me to enable the dynamics that kept kids from growing into thoughtful, analytical, and empowered people.
More on this in posts to come...! I'm glad to be connected with you, Liz!
This is such important stuff to write about, Evie, and I’m glad you are doing it! Like you said, as a teacher you really can’t complain publicly while you’re in it, so it’s up to people like us who’ve left the profession to share our stories.
Thank you for reading my writing! I always check out my new subscribers; that’s how I’ve found some of my favorite writers on Substack. Whatever the algorithm did, I am so happy we connected! I look forward to reading more of your work. 😁
By the way, I love the notes you shared from your students! Some of the girls in my seventh grade class used to write little love notes to me on the whiteboard. I took pictures of every single one before I erased them (and sometimes I would leave them up for a few days ;).
I would do the same! Holding onto the small things makes all the difference on a rainy day. I have a whole box of silly notes and stickers and scraps of paper 😆
As a recovering middle- and high-school teacher, I empathize with this so deeply. I barely made it through two years, and the dread was so deep that I was envious of the construction flagger I passed every morning on my commute. I gazed longingly at the “We’re hiring!” sign at Walmart. I was working 15-hour days teaching 6 different subjects for the first time. The janitors had to kick me out every night at 10pm. And on top of that—the behaviors, the lack of support from the administration, the parents, etc.
Like you, I loved the actual teaching, and the kids (some of the most challenging ones loved me the most). But the job was hell. I don’t know how anyone managed during the pandemic when everything had to go online.
Please know you’re not alone, and I’m glad to see someone writing about this! I’d love to hear more about what motivated your decision to leave. Kudos for following your dream to write and make art! I’m doing the same (minus the art).
Wow. I just had to read this over twice to be sure it was real. I just started this Substack out of a need to get my thoughts on a page and hold myself accountable to remembering my teaching experience and also affirm my decision to leave. Then, to find your newsletter (which is fantastic by the way -- I'm not even sure how I stumbled upon it but I was reading through multiple essays of yours this morning), and for you to in turn read and RELATE to what I am writing about is even more serendipitous and beautiful!
Your comment inspires me to commit to centering my newsletter around the experience of being a teacher. As I wrote, I felt that while teaching I couldn't actually express what I was going through. Now that I have the time, I hope that other teachers find my writing and feel a little less alone too.
I decided to leave because I was burnt out and also tired of feeling like a cog in this very broken system. I hated that my job required me to enable the dynamics that kept kids from growing into thoughtful, analytical, and empowered people.
More on this in posts to come...! I'm glad to be connected with you, Liz!
This is such important stuff to write about, Evie, and I’m glad you are doing it! Like you said, as a teacher you really can’t complain publicly while you’re in it, so it’s up to people like us who’ve left the profession to share our stories.
Thank you for reading my writing! I always check out my new subscribers; that’s how I’ve found some of my favorite writers on Substack. Whatever the algorithm did, I am so happy we connected! I look forward to reading more of your work. 😁
You, too! :))) Substack is a magical community!
By the way, I love the notes you shared from your students! Some of the girls in my seventh grade class used to write little love notes to me on the whiteboard. I took pictures of every single one before I erased them (and sometimes I would leave them up for a few days ;).
I would do the same! Holding onto the small things makes all the difference on a rainy day. I have a whole box of silly notes and stickers and scraps of paper 😆